Sunday, August 24, 2014

Five Unpopular Opinions

Normally I provide one unpopular opinion and expound at length.  However, the unpopular opinions I have lately are on subjects that are not especially weighty.  That is not to say I couldn't find more to say about them at a future date.  But for now, I give you not one, but five randomly chosen unpopular opinions.

1.  Get off my lawn!  Usually when that expression is used, it is meant to paint the speaker as a crotchety, out-of-touch, inflexible nincompoop who hates the free-flowing awesomeness of young people.  Omigod, how dare this geezer resent young people romping on his lawn?  It's like he cares about respect for other people's possessions or something.  If you worked hard to maintain your property, or something equivalent, why shouldn't you resent the people who make light of, and ruin, your efforts?        

2.  I can't stand Pixar's UP.  People treat this movie like it's the high watermark of cinema.  The first 10 minutes were poignant, but the rest?  The little boy made me want to rupture my eardrums with a pencil.  The "house flown by balloons" could have been so inventive in Miyazaki's hands, but was never used to its potential here.  Instead, it became a standard adventure film, where the bad guys chased the good guys through the jungle.  To show how not-old and still relevant he was, Carl performed physical feats with his walker that gymnasts could not equal.  This would not have bothered me -- it is a cartoon, after all -- if I weren't watching UP with my father, who at a too-young age would never again be able to cross a room without the aid of a walker.
Like he wouldn't break his back having to pull an 
entire house.  Yeesh. 

3.  I never want to hear the words "selfie" or "photobomb" again.  When did taking a picture of yourself, or getting caught in someone else's picture, become such a novelty that it required its own catchword?

4.  No, she is not "the worst." It's become a trend among media critics, and in general, to respond to someone's actions with a sneering "She (or he) is just the worst!"  Whether it's a celebrity who wore the wrong outfit or a character who slept with her best friend's boyfriend, you can count on this critic to mark it with the withering putdown of an eighth grader.  I don't even need to mention why this expression is ridiculous -- the daily newspaper is filled with offenses far worse than anything Marni did on Girls.  But calling someone "the worst" also smacks of laziness.  The critic doesn't need to describe why the characters' actions were wrong.  Just call that character "the worst" and the reader gets the idea.       

Nice try...
5.  I do not find Don Draper sexy.  Love him or hate him, gay or straight, we are supposed to be overcome by his magnetism and his utter beauty, right?  I mean he's attractive, but... eh.  His personality is too loathsome, his outlook too static, for me to ever separate it from his admittedly fine physique.  Then again, I'm a little weird when it comes to what I find attractive.  For instance, I don't think present-day Colin Firth is that sexy, but I do find the real George VI (whom Firth played in The King's Speech) to be quite the looker.

I just said that I don't find Colin Firth sexy?  Now I'm going to get it.

You on the other hand......... *swoon*

The above images were used under the Fair Use Doctrine.

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